I have come to a few realizations.

1.  I am never going to "conquer"  bi-polar disorder.

2.  I WILL have depressive episodes.

3.  I WILL have episodes of mania.

How I handle all of this is up to me.

It is my responsibility to NOT put myself into unhealthy situations when I am in any of the above states.

It is my responsibility to protect myself and my family when any of the above states are in full swing.

It is my responsibility to go to my family if I even think I am in one of these states, this way we can get things in order and have plans of action.

I will also have to go to therapy for the rest of my life.  Let that realization sink in....it is quite refreshing.

Meds alone don't do it for me.  I have to talk and blog in order to keep a clear head and stay the course.  Currently this is a 3 time a week thing for me.Will it change?  

Maybe....as of right now, No and for the first time ever, I am content with that...