90% of the time I am OK with having a mental illness.  I mean, I really cannot help it...I y'am what I y'am said Popeye.

Then there are other times that it really hits home that I am legitimately mentally ill.  That I am one of "those" people and it bothers me.  A Lot.

Tonight my reminder alarm for my meds went off and I went in to refill my med box for the week and take tonight's happy pills.  It was at that moment it hit home.  I have an illness that is NEVER going away,  EVER.

I will never have a reprieve from it, ever.  The only way it goes away for me is when I die.  Not that I WANT to die, mind you!  It is just a hell of a thing to be reminded of at times.